First step… Slow Down

She asked me how I am

Without thinking I replied ‘wild’.

In that moment I stopped and thought about it again.

What am I talking about?

Are you familiar with phrases such as »super busy« »crazy« or »working hard«?

Modern woman today complains that time flies, that kids grow up fast and how it is Monday and then suddenly Sunday and a new week starts.

Not to mention how sometimes when I wish her a nice weekend, a woman looks at me like she doesn’t even know what a weekend is anymore.

So, you juggle a lot of work, lack of time, having to be in three places at the same time while also running a household. Which leads to you thinking that cloning is not such a bad idea after all, when you should be at two meetings, a parental and a business one simultaneously, while the second child has a music school performance or a football match.

The fact that you are attached to your phone 24/7, that you are even taking it with you to the toilet, and that some are thinking that they would get it implanted into their arms, does not seem out of the ordinary to you at all.

Despite everything, you know, deep inside yourself, that slowing down is the only way to protect your health and common sense in this crazy pace of your mundane life.

Being trapped in your head, thinking about what needs to be done today, what you have to do tomorrow, and what must happen by the end of the month is the reality in which you live. At the same time, you get even farther away from your heart.

To get in sync with your heart, with your heart’s desires, with your Feminine Soul, you have to dive into your body first.

To be able to do this, you must slow down.

Otherwise, it simply will not happen.

The truth is that you have to stop at the gas station if you want to fill your car with fuel.

I like to say that we all have our full potential at hand. But you have to consciously choose it, make it visible, activate it and embody it, to really start living it in the 3D world.

To live you potential in its fullness, you have to slow down first. This is the only way to relax and open so that you can accept and allow this to feed and fill you in order to share it from your fullness with people and the world.

Slowing down is crucial if you want to survive in this wild world.

Because if you do not stop yourself, your body will stop you. Your health to be precise. Better said, the absence of health.

In order to nourish and nurture everybody else, you must FIRST, nourish and nurture yourself.

In order to regenerate, your body needs rest.

It needs time to recover.

You cannot force this.

You cannot speed up your healing.

With effort nothing will happen.

I have heard the most fascinating and contradicting statement from a colleague who is an entrepreneur. She shared with me that she discovered in practice that the more time she takes for herself and her enjoyment, the more she thrives in business.

It is not surprising, therefore, that more and more attention is being paid to the mindfulness and being present and listening to yourself.

It is very important to know ways to move yourself from your head into your body, because this is what is essential for a modern woman. Men have different practices than women.

Therefore, it is not wise to try to force yourself into male spiritual practices.

1. Relax. And yes, I am aware of how that sounds. I sometimes get that »you’re crazy« look from women. But one thing I can assure you out of my personal experience is: If you are tense and tight you are not going to relax into your body. And you can only feel if you allow yourself to be present in your body. The challenge is in the fact that when you start feeling, the first thing that comes up is the pain from your past that you have not felt because of the numbness. Pain has a message. An important message that reminds you to stop and relax. Find your own ways. With air … breathing. With water … swimming. With fire … watching flames. With earth … walks in the nature. Use sensual breathing … breathe in deeply and exhale the sound Aaaaa.

2. Calm down, time isn’t money. Even though I hear it often. And I used to believe it myself. As a mother of two children and an entrepreneur I have always had the feeling that there was no way I could take some time for myself. I took a whole backpack of books with me on a vacation only to discover that reading has become work for me instead of relaxing. My partner has been the one to open my eyes for how important it is to put myself first and enjoy things that fill me up, because that is the only way to be the best woman I can be with him, my children and everyone else. One of the most important questions in a day is: How can i find pleasure today?

3. If you don’t feel a »Yes, Yes!« on the inside, say »NO«. This one was the most difficult for me. I was domesticated into people pleasing and proving that I can do everything myself. My issue with setting limits and taking care of myself first was more than obvious. Once I set the boundaries to my daughters and then to my husband, I had to set them in the business area as well. Instead of trying to serve and be a part of every event, I listen to myself, what is it that makes my heart sing? If it does not sing, I say no. And that is how I closed the doors of my workspace. Because I know that the point is to do the things that you love doing. When you let go of things, people, practices that do not fulfil you, you make space for the things that do. And your Me Time is the key element of slowing down.

4. Enjoy the moment. Part of being fully embodied and truly present is the ability to feel pleasure in what you are doing. I often hear from women, how they do not have time, and how they yearn for a vacation. The wisdom is hidden in 60 second breaks that you can do anytime. To fill up and feed your Feminine Soul, you do not need a weekend workshop or weekly retreat, although if I am honest, they are nice. It is vital that you are absolutely in this moment and that you allow yourself to truly feel pleasure in observing beauty, breathing, in the peace that you feel within you. It takes 60 seconds to get in touch with these essential qualities. With practice, of course.

It is, of course, wise to take time for meditation, escape out of town, and relax on vacation. However, it is important that you do not wait for this time as something outside of you, somewhere. Once. When you will be able to get away from everything.
The art is in being in the greatest chaos and connected with yourself at the same time. You can fill up and regenerate while in the middle of chaos at work. That is what you are mastering.

To see the preciousness in yourself. In this moment. Exactly where you are.
You do not have to go anywhere. You just need to Dive in.

Be the Light you want to see in the World, out there!

Taja Albolena
Mer-Woman, Soulpreness
♥ www.taja.albolena.com